Hi again
few things changed since last post Andrew Lansley's listening exercise got some press time apparently though he only listens with one ear because he has not made many changes to his plans for the future of our NHS. He has said that nurses can be on the commissioning boards just one nurse though how on earth will we choose that nurse, and talking of the coalition they are causing a lot of disturbance among the unions they all want to go on strike because of the cuts which apparently are due to the fat cat parasites who are receiving public sector pensions, show me a retired nurse who can manage on there pension alone and ill show you an NHS trust that isn't trying to make huge savings and not cutting frontline services!! we are not parasites...
Apparently one trust in the UK has banned its nurses from showing cleavage , because of complaints from patients, they can no longer wear mini skirts or tight tops, since when did a mini skirt form part of a nurses uniform apparently this is only applying to members of staff wearing mufti, but will nurses be afraid to undo there top buttons on a hot day now or go without tights in the tropical wards in summer, i thought we were in the NHS not a carry on film
and finally we were always taught never to upset orthopaedic surgeons because they get mad but i think this one deserves a pat on the back crazy orthopod i wouldnt want the politicians or a film crew on my ward with or without sleeves.........
A true reflection of the life, times and trials of a Nurse working in today's NHS in criminal justice , and maybe just a hint of anything else I may feel is relevant.
Friday 17 June 2011
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When God Created Nurses
When the Lord made Nurses He was into his sixth day of overtime.
An angel appeared and said, "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one." And the Lord said, "Have you read the specs on this order? A nurse has to be able to help an injured person, breathe life into a dying person, and give comfort to a family that has lost their only child and not wrinkle their uniform. They have to be able to lift 3 times their own weight, work 12 to 16 hours straight without missing a detail, console a grieving mother as they are doing CPR on a baby they know will never breathe again. They have to be in top mental condition at all times, running on too-little sleep, black coffee and half-eaten meals. And they have to have six pairs of hands.
The angel shook her head slowly and said, "Six pairs of hands...no way!" "It's not the hands that are causing me problems," said the Lord, "It's the two pairs of eyes a nurse has to have." "That's on the standard model?" asked the angel. The Lord nodded.
"One pair that does quick glances while making note of any physical changes, And another pair of eyes that can look reassuringly at a bleeding patient and say, "You'll be all right ma'am" when they know it isn't so."
"Lord," said the angel, touching his sleeve, "rest and work on this tomorrow." "I can't," said the Lord, "I already have a model that can talk to a 250 pound grieving family member whose child has been hit by a drunk driver...who, by the way, is laying in the next room uninjured, and feed a family of five on a nurse's paycheck."
The angel circled the model of the nurse very slowly, "Can it think?" she asked. "You bet," said the Lord. "It can tell you the symptoms of 100 illnesses; recite drug calculations in its sleep; intubate, defibrillate, medicate, and continue CPR nonstop until help arrives...and still it keeps its sense of humor. This nurse also has phenomenal personal control. They can deal with a multi-victim trauma, coax a frightened elderly person to unlock their door, comfort a murder victim's family, and then read in the daily paper how nurses are insensitive and uncaring and are only doing a job." Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek of the nurse.
"There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told you that you were trying to put too much into this model." "That's not a leak," said the Lord, "It's a tear." "What's the tear for?" asked the angel. "It's for bottled-up emotions, for patients they've tried in vain to save, for commitment to the hope that they will make a difference in a person's chance to survive, for life." "You're a genius," said the angel.
The Lord looked somber. "I didn't put it there," He said.